Rules Instead of Reasoning: How Complex Trauma Shapes Our Choices
And ways to improve balance.
My friend Jamie was online looking for omega-3 supplements. He knew his vegan diet wasn't giving him enough of these healthy fats, and with his anxiety, depression, and health anxiety, all neurological issues that could benefit from nutritional support, he wanted to make sure he was taking care of his nervous system. He typed "vegan omega-3" into the search bar. An attractive website for Omvits came up, probably optimized to rank high in search results and designed to appeal to vegans. He clicked through, liked what he saw, and ordered the supplement.
We are close friends, and I know he is working diligently on his CPTSD (complex post-traumatic stress disorder) issues, so of course I saw this from that perspective. When he told me about his purchase, I made some assumptions about his purchasing process. I could well be wrong, but having personal experience with CPTSD, I know how it goes. My first thought was that plant-based omegas weren't as bioavailable as animal-based ones, and that while Jamie is vegan for ethical reasons, he may not realize that vegan isn't necessarily the most ethical choice. So I looked for facts.
I pasted whole articles into our chat. I'm sure he didn't read them. He asked what I meant about black and white thinking. I explained it was about the value of vegan omegas versus ethically sourced fish oil - that this could be a CPTSD thing. I told him, "You haven't done anything wrong. The whole vegan omega thing just started a line of thought and I shared it with you because you're studying this stuff. I'm going to write an article about it."
The Rule in Action
Jamie's supplement thought process shows what happens when decisions are based on rules instead of reasoning. When people don't know how to weigh different factors, they either follow rigid guidelines or get overwhelmed and go with impulse. Jamie did both. His rule: vegan equals good, non-vegan equals bad. When faced with options, he went with the first attractive website.
This approach misses the nuance that could have informed his choice. Fish oil from certified sustainable fisheries might actually be more ethical than algae supplements from industrial farms using synthetic fertilizers. The algae-based omega-3s aren't absorbed nearly as well by the body as fish-derived ones. For someone dealing with neurological symptoms like anxiety and depression, bioavailability matters. The choice that felt ethical might work against both his health goals and his environmental values.
Jamie didn't weigh these factors because his brain sorted the decision automatically. Vegan goes in the good category. Fish oil goes in the bad category. Decision made.
Why the Brain Makes Rules
Complex trauma creates rigid thinking as a survival mechanism. Kids who grow up without safety and good modeling never learn flexible decision-making tools. They develop rules instead of reasoning. This shows up in everyday choices that can seem to align with our values but actually work against them.
CPTSD develops from repeated trauma over time, usually in childhood. This could be abuse, neglect, or simply growing up in a household where emotions were unpredictable and safety felt uncertain. The developing brain learns that the world is dangerous and unpredictable. To cope, it creates rigid categories: safe versus unsafe, good versus bad, trustworthy versus untrustworthy.
These categories help a child navigate chaos. If dad is angry, stay quiet. If mom is drinking, hide in your room. If someone offers help, be suspicious. The rules work because they're simple and they protect.
But children in these situations miss something crucial. They don't get to watch adults wrestle with complex decisions. They don't see how healthy families weigh competing values, consider context, or change course when they get new information. They miss the modeling that teaches flexible thinking and problem-solving.
Instead, they learn that uncertainty equals danger. Uncertainty and complexity feel threatening. The safest path is to follow clear rules that remove discomfort.
When Rules Replace Reasoning
This pattern shows up everywhere once you know what to look for. The person who cuts off friends completely after one disagreement because they don't know how to work through conflict. The career choice based on what feels "safe" rather than considering multiple factors like fulfillment, growth potential, and financial needs. The political beliefs that become rigid ideology. They don't consider new information or adjust their positions when circumstances change.
In Jamie's case, veganism became the rule for valid reasons. But then animal products became automatically bad, regardless of context. This rule helped him feel aligned with his values around animal welfare. But it also prevented him from considering whether his choices actually served those values.
When we follow rules instead of reasoning, we miss opportunities to make decisions that truly align with our deeper goals. The rule feels protective, but it can actually work against what we care most about.
From Rules to Reason
Recognition - Notice the urgency that signals rigid thinking in action. The feeling that a decision must be made RIGHT NOW. Anxiety, frustration, or hopelessness when facing choices. Everyone's warning signals will be different.
Personal responses - Interrupt the rush to decide. Most decisions don't need to be made immediately, even when they feel urgent. Wait overnight before choosing. If anxiety is present, it's often a clue that important information is missing. Identify what is unknown and what additional information can be gathered. One additional piece of information already improves the decision. No one is an expert in everything.
Social and educational approaches - Create cultures of supportive decision-making training. Use peer support to practice weighing options together rather than defaulting to rigid rules.
Rules make daily life possible. They're essential for daily life - if we had to make complex decisions about every small choice, we'd all be paralyzed. People with complex trauma simply rely on rules more heavily because they didn't learn flexible thinking and problem-solving skills during childhood. The pattern is understandable given the circumstances. These skills are learnable at any age, and developing them goes far toward reducing many of the associated effects of CPTSD.
Read More
Nutrients Better Sourced from Animal Products in Certain Circumstances
Detailed breakdown of nutrients that are more bioavailable from animal sources and when this might matter for individual health needs.
Nutrition for Plant-based Diets: Managing Nutrient Intake and Bioavailability (Kerry Health & Nutrition Institute, 2024)
Comprehensive guide comparing absorption rates of key nutrients from animal vs plant sources, including practical methods to improve bioavailability through cooking and food combinations.